Here are some of Dawn’s best status updates to date:
coNfuCioUs sAyz “2 mUcH oF a gOOd tHiNg iZ a bAd tHing”…no WaY cOnfUciOus u JuSt jEaLouZ, LuV my GyM GuRLzz 6:53 AM Apr 8th
juS foUnD mOre CigaRette bUrnss oN my iNnner thighzz fRom lass wekenn…hahah w/e…BeCca U kno…9:07 PM Apr 7th via web
“aCtUaLLy…I KinDa Lyke MatH cLazz” — AlyssA ………hahAHAhAH dA Fuck??8:58 PM Apr 7th via web
WTFFF!!! aNyone eLse’s AOL acTin mYsTerioUz???!!!!!!!!! 9:00 PM Apr 8th
fiNaLy… whY cALL iT fAst fOod iF Itz sLoW as sHiT… sNaCkin oN nUggEts, yEa iTz a viCe…. 3:45 PM Apr 9th
EvRy bOdy bReaKs dOwn soMetiMez; iT’s aLL iN hOw u cHoose 2 sMeLL tHe dAisYz – AnD LoRd dO theY sMeLL gOod… ~ ;o] ~ smoKin hErb w cAroL8:04 AM Apr 10th
LOL Sum b*Tch @SpliShSpLashWP seZ i cAnT sMOkE my NeWps on da LAzy RivEr. w/e sHe haZ fAt kiDS2:15 PM Apr 10th
iT’s amAziN wUt a gOOd brOwNie sUndaE cAn dO 4 a GuRL n’ hEr sEx driVe….lol diD i SaY daT ouTLouD?4:47 PM Apr 11th
*riCky bRouGht mE rOzes*=) cARefUL wHat u WiSh 4, RiCky…. i dOn’t thiNk u rEadY 4 diS jELLyyy~ haAAaAaaHAAaa ;PPP ~bAby u evRyThiNg 2 mE~11:48 AM Apr 13th
So i Look At Me and lOoK at u Now tell me hunny…WhO’s JeaLouS oF wHo1:30 PM Apr 13th
“yEa i’M a lAdy wit sOme gRAde D kLaZz; sOme mAy fiNd bOoks fUnniE– 4 mE iTz buRpZ, fArtz n’ AzZ…”9:42 AM Apr 14th
skiPpin cLasS 2 gO c HOT TUB TIME MACHINE w/kriSta n’ jOey….aY pApi 
8:15 AM Apr 15th
cAn a KaT chOoze 2 bYte u wHen iTz asLeep?? JUst pLayiN *~dEViL’z aDvokate~*…2:27 PM Apr 15th
SiMon SeZ: miNd uR oWn busiNeSs…8:52 AM Apr 16th
daD iz gRillin poRk ChoPz,,i eAt lyKe a qUeeN on fRidaYz;)3:11 PM Apr 16th
aLwayz reMembr 2 LeAve No sTonE uNturnEd ….unleSs u *sToNed*…..6:23 PM Apr 16th
wHoevERz deciZon it wuz 2 caNceL uGLy BettY, i got 4 woRds 4 u… *loCo en De cAbeZa*1:00 PM Apr 17th
SmoKin HukAh wiT gAry… Cellz go0d♥9:11 AM Apr 18th
hEaded 2 bEst buY wit Ricky….aLL ninTendo DS gAmez 30% off, hAllelujah hOlla baCk10:18 AM Apr 18th
gUess iTz oFFiciAL… mAy tHe wOrLd sMoKe uP…. hehehe… tHe REAL nAtiOnaL hOLidAy… *hAppiE fOuR tWeNtYyyY* ~iNdEpEnDEncE DaY 2.0~10:28 PM Apr 19th
cLoUdy w/ a cHaNcE a bLuNt sMoKe…10:17 AM Apr 20th
*~pUrpLe hAzE aLL iN mY bRaiN~* sNaCkin oN dUnKarOOz & kiLbASsi in gArY’s bAsemEnT…1:41 PM Apr 20th
~paSsiN oUt 2 GOoNiEs~6:48 PM Apr 20th
JuSt fouNd a hAir in my tAco’z,,umm bUon aPPetiT? LoLz u wiN sUm u looZe suM on tAco daY…..9:53 AM Apr 21st
MaKin iMprOvemEnTz iN aLL asPeCts oF liFe… MeEt tHe New miSs dAwN PriNzeSsa DeMaYo … *~cHarMed i’M sUrE~*2:21 PM Apr 21st
So iF u wRite reViewZ 4 bEst bUy, dO u sTerEotyPe stEreo tYpez? ThiNk ‘boUt it 
6:04 PM Apr 21st
I’m soRry but Hot doGz froM 711 r nAsty,,u tRippin iF u feeLin tHose thiNgz12:01 PM Apr 22nd
sOmE boYs r liKe *piNocCio*.. they SwEet & tHey cUte, bUt eVry tiMe tHey tELL a *LiE* sumn gRoWs BiGGeR… ~aNd iT aiN’t tHey nOsE~ =X1:01 PM Apr 22nd
dO my eYes dEceive me??? wHo kNew gAbbY cud pEnnY dRoP wiTh suCh gRacE & cOnTroL… kEep aN eYe on tHis oNe, sHaWn jOhnSon =P5:50 PM Apr 22nd
lunCh w/ my gUrLz…pfff if tHese wAllz cuD taLk rite 9:55 AM Apr 23rd
sOmeTiMez i wiSh i cUd sHriNk & livE in an uGG b00t ;P *~PiPe dReaMz~*12:47 PM Apr 23rd
“Cuz itZ fRiday nite n’ I fEel aLrite, da paRty’z heRe on dA wEst siDe”-roB Base…fukkin sTill tRu 2 tHis daY4:00 PM Apr 23rd
BreAkfast @ aPpLbEe’s wiT da fAm, suKkin dOwn siLva doLLaR pAncaKez liKe iTz my jOb… ~suCh a fAtty~ :/8:45 AM Apr 24th
juSt madE a sURpriSe viSit 2 mY nEice nAtasHa O:)aNgeLinaO:) rOse,,sHe bEauTiful.I gUess iTz tRu,,appLe don’t fAll faR fRom tHa trEe….2:51 PM Apr 24th
mY dAd juSt tOok a dUmP iN my bAtHroOm..lol i kNo iTz nAsTy but if u wUz heRe & u kNew my dAd u’d giggoo 2 … ~sTiNky bUt fUnniE~4:24 PM Apr 24th
MiLey cYrus neeDz 2 sHut tha fUck up aLreaDy8:40 AM Apr 25th
hAtin’ on tHis biO proJecT,, I caN do nEthing tHru ~jEsUs cHriSt~ wHo stRenGtheNz me eVeryDay 
11:03 AM Apr 25th
wHo dA fUk is SuSan bOyLe??? yo @MaRioLoPeZeXtRa u & Extra gOTTa giTchA pRioRitiEs sTraiGht…12:50 PM Apr 25th
pEpperoNi bAgeL biTez or piGz in a bLanKet?? noT tha bEst diNner opTionz lol, geT 2 thA fuKKin sTorE aLreadY ma…..2:22 PM Apr 25th
omg TiGGer frum wiNniE tHa pOoH is 2 cUte…srsLy iMa cRy4:00 PM Apr 25th
“sPeak soFtLy buT carry a HuGe fuKKin gaT” T-paiN,,,haPpy mOndAy evErybodY don’t tAke cRaP froM noboDy 5:50 AM Apr 26th
maKin tHat cheddA @CVS fRom 5 ta cLose,,coMe up fOr buY 1 gEt 1 viDaL saSsOonz1:43 PM Apr 26th
hOneStLy wHen aLL iz sAid n’ dOne…gReeN dAy aCtuaLLy gOt sUm iLL sTuFf…iMa thiNk BouT thiS, lemMe geT bAck aT yA aLL in a BiT3:34 PM Apr 26th
HOLDUP!! aLriTe itZ oFFicaL. biLLy joE iz seXxy, n’ he iz 100% NOT an aMericAn iDioT….6:16 PM Apr 26th
bAgELz n’ pANini’s…loRd sTriKe mE dOwn iF tHeRez a beTTa bUFFet tHan sAnTaNoz9:40 AM Apr 27th
sO SoRRy 2 diSsaPpoiNt u, *jELouSy*… bUt *~cOnFideNce~* tAkeS pRioriTy… nAiLz wiT dA lAdiEz♥12:44 PM Apr 27th
Wut kiNda beEz mAke miLk?? AnSwer…booBeez (.)(.) Lol u goT a LottA sPicE aUdreY,,goOd tYmez @anGeL tiPz1:50 PM Apr 27th
neW seaSoN tHe HILLZ 2NiTE!! i heAr u wYLin’ aLreaDy riCky,, u beTTa sHut tHoSe LiPz sWeeTheaRt cuz u wAtcHin eVry G*d daMn sCene wiT me 4:53 PM Apr 27th
I am a BLaCk wiDow aT heArt And I wiLL eAt u & mY bAbyiEz iF nEceSsary 4 mE 2 sUrvivE….rUtHLesS mAybE bUt *WiZe* nOne tHa LeSs…10:58 AM Apr 28th
mAkiN pLans 4 *~MY BIRTHDAY 2MORROW!!!!!!!~* 15 a biG yEar… siSqO wUz a fReesTyLin wiZaRd by 9 sO i gOTTa mOve3:09 PM Apr 28th
Omg my moM mAkeZ tHa be$t fUnFetti cUpcaKez!! DeAr ma,,sUmtiMez u aCt LyKe a c*nT, buT u mAke sWeEt muSiQ in thA kiTchEn.Luv n’ hUgz, DaWn3:14 PM Apr 28th
AboUt 2 geT *bLunTed* up wiT <3riCky n’ gAry so I cOuLd sLeeP e-z n’ wAke up 2mOrroW a neW woMan….a nEw ~15 yEar oLd woMaN~5:29 PM Apr 28th
wHaT whAt iHOP biRtHdAy bRunCh wiTh tHa biTcHez… sOrrY gArY u gOTTa wAiT iN tHa cAr 4 Yr eGGz bEnEdiCt… ~lAdiEz oNLy~9:49 AM Apr 29th
so I cOme baK 2 sKooL n’ my loCker iz wRappEd w/ bLunT wrApz LOL! U guYz rEally kNo hOw 2 bUtta mY bReAd 11:08 AM Apr 29th
bEniHana wiT dA fAm…yO dA fUk tHis cHef dOin wit dAt giNko kNiFe hE mAd TaLenTed3:25 PM Apr 29th
OMG mY mOm jUst cAuGhT a sHrimP TaiL iN hEr Titz…go0d hAnd-eYe Ma u bitCh lol #bEniHaNabiRthdAy4:39 PM Apr 29th
hOLd uP–aGenT cOdy bAnks on diSnEy cHannEL?? riCky, dO u kNo miCky mOuSe pErsoNaLLy?? cAuse u jUst mAde mY mAgiCoo KinGdOm dReAmz cuM tRu<36:48 PM Apr 29th
sTill on ~*cLoUd 9*~ riCky u bEen bLesSed wiT a giFt bAby<38:01 AM Apr 30th
If looKz cuD kiLL u’d be iN jAiL by nOw riCkY….buT I’d bAiL u oUt10:00 AM Apr 30th
hEllo kiTTy noTebOok $2.99. riHAnna CD $14. foRevEr21 giFt cerTifiCate $50. bEst fuKKin sExX I eVa haD….pRicELe$5:29 PM Apr 30th
waTchiN ~kiNg of qUeeNs~ cuz kEviN jAmes iz tHa fuNnieSt fuKKin wHiTe boY on tHa pLaNetttttt 3:03 PM May 3rd
“bEauTy iS n’ tHe eYe oF tHa bEhOLder…dAtz wHy bELLe faLLin 4 tHe *bEaSt* iz s0 craZy, u kNo??”- *~wALt DiSnEy~*♥10:54 AM May 4th
KeePiN’ K00L oN diS swEatY n’ dAnK-aSs dAy…suCkin diRty iCe cuBeZ fRom bAsemEnt fRiDge ~dEspEraTe tiMez cALL 4 sKuZzy soLutiOns, sLuT~ ;P2:23 PM May 4th
I kNo ~*moTha tHeResa*~ oNce sAid eaRLy biRd get tHa woRm,,tHis mAy b tRu buT tha onLy tHiNg I’m gEttin fRom bEin up riGht noW iz a hEadaChe…FML 6:18 AM May 5th
hApPiE ciNcO dE mAyO eVryBoDy: http://tiny.cc/r2yxg LuV n sPaniSh kiSsEs, Dawn “CinCo” DeMayo <312:15 PM May 5th
LiVe wEll,,LuV a loT,, n’ sLeeP aZ muCh as u fuKKin cAn lol g’niTe peoPLez9:37 PM May 5th
ATTN: riCky’s sTepdad’s PoOL nOw oPen…iMa rOcK mY tiVa’s, a pUrpLe oNe piEce, aNd oF coUrsE mR. TwEety biRd oN mY toWeL heh heh =)7:09 AM May 6th
~liFe iS go0d wHen u aiN’t gOt moUtHs 2 fEed~ sHoUt oUt 2 yoUng mOmz u bEautiFuL7:10 AM May 6th
“bRuSh maH tEeTh wiT a piPe fuLL a’ hErB” – oRigiNaL Ke$hA TiK ToK LyRix, rEcoRd cOmpAnY mAdE hEr cHanGe iT i rEad dAt iTz tRu1:28 PM May 6th
I teLL u wuTz on mY miNd….itZ bRowNie suNdaeZ rofl sTep yo gAme uP baSkiN roBBinz11:49 PM May 7th
OH HELL NO IT AINT RAININ 2DAY…hOLy cOmMuNiOn pOsTpoNed…:/7:48 AM May 8th
iF *~bLeSsed aRe tHoSe wHo sEeK tHe fRuiT oF a gOod wOMaN~* dEn riCky u mUst b a G*d dAmn *~sAiNt pAuL~* O=)about 21 hours ago
I knoW maRy J bLigE onCe sAid “don’t hAte tHa pLaYa hAte tHa gAme”…tRuTh iz I luV tHa pLaYa n’ I LuV thA gaMe LmfaO,,riCky u goRgeOus about 12 hours ago
“MoThaz r tRu aNd MoThaz r sWeeT; I cAme oUttA yOur vAgiNa, And 4 mE dAs a tReAt” <3 luV u mAmA DeMaYo, gEt *LAid* <3 mWaabout 5 hours ago
MotHer’s dAy tRadiTion tJ mAxx shoPPin spRee,,leT ya iNhiBitiOnz go….n’ yA cRediT liMiT about 1 hour ago
